EXPERIENCE 1 ENERGY 0

What I have gained in experience, I have lost in energy. No matter how many times I try to tell myself I do not feel any different than I did at 35, my body screams LIAR. The power of a three year old cannot be absorbed through osmosis.

Do not ever underestimate the mind of a three year old when it comes to calculating how to regain the attention he feels he so justly deserves at all times. I can guarantee he will go to extreme measures, my wet socks being a dead give away.

Why is it that I can't get him to brush his teeth, but ...let him find an old toothbrush on the deck that I use to clean the vacuum cleaner filter? How much panic is acceptable when you can't find the toilet brush, but you can find the plunger...in the living room? Why is it that he is so close to the toilet bowl, he can't seem to hit it?

Daylight savings time is seriously over rated. I can't seem to convince him that it's OK to go to sleep while it's still light out but not OK to get up when it isn't.

Everything in my house is either sticky, gooey or gritty. Sugar smacks stick to the bottom of your socks better than any other cereal on the market. I am convinced that Holden's body is composed of double faced tape and magnets, so that when he is in his playroom all he has to do is spread his arms wide and collect as much stuff as his little body can hold and deposit them in the rest of the house. I still have not figured out why this process does not work in reverse unless his room is harboring a recharger. I understand obstacle courses enhance balance and agility, but does that mean we should increase our insurance premiums also?

Holden got a Woopie cushion from his Auntie.I have easily reached the conclusion there is nothing more fascinating to a little boy than a rubber balloon that sounds like farts... He tucks it under his shirt and asks for a HUGGIE. We woke up to the sweet sound first thing this morning.  It will break his little heart not to be allowed to bring it to "show and tell.